I saw my father do school run for his children, and even some of our neighbors.
I saw my father take his girls to Abakpa Market to braid their hair. Those market women were the best then. We came all the way from CBN Estate to get an exceptional hair style from these market women.
I saw my dad drive us to “Mrs. Emeka’s Lesson” in Trans-Ekulu. Students go there especially when preparing for an exam. Junior Waec or senior Waec, etc.
I saw my dad cook food and give his 4 children and some of my relations when my mum was away or sick to cook for the family. My dad will enter the kitchen.
I saw my dad go to Roban Stores when it was at All Saint’s bus stop near Shop Rite, GRA Enugu, to buy groceries for the family.
During school hours, I saw my dad sneak in and out of my boarding school at Lady Ibiam Girls Secondary School Enugu, to give me some pastries and water. I remember how severally I saw tiny white chalk dust on his fingers. He would always say to me, I’m just coming out of the lecture hall. Yes! My dad was a seasoned lecturer and HOD Prelim in IMT at that time, in 2002. I kind of realized he was always thinking about my siblings and I while also teaching other parents’ children(Students).
I saw my dad take his car and my Mum’s car to the mechanic respectively to get them fixed. I saw my dad buy us exercise books, novels, and other educational materials.
I saw my dad frequently plan picnics or hang out with the family at Nikelake Resort, Anamco, etc. We got registered in some very exotic hotels where we go to swim, play tennis games and recreate. He believed in recreation.
I saw my dad drive us to church every Sunday as the spiritual leader. He never missed his daily morning Mass.
I saw my dad pay so much attention to our academics and total well-being before he handed it over to my mum.💔
I saw my dad do all these and so much more with delight. These memories gladden my soul even though he is no more.🩷
Imagine if I never had such beautiful experiences, or stories to tell. Each time I remember my dad, I remember good things. People who knew him can relate. Late. Innocent Agbo, the good and caring husband, father, and friend.
Why am I sharing this?
Fathers must rise up to their responsibilities. You are not leaving the earth’s surface now, but while you are here, take responsibility. Your wife is just a help meet. A helper! A helper! A helper!!!
Don’t think that because women are naturally graced with some strength, they can do all things and don’t need help in this parenting journey. No!
You see that assignment your child brings home? Sometimes attend to it.
Do you see that cooking your wife does for the family? Sometimes join her. Sometimes just cook and serve your family.👍
You see the matter of spirituality? You are the leader. Lead prayers in your house, be the prayer warrior. 🙏
You see your child’s notebooks and writing materials? Sometimes inspect them. 👌
You see going to the Market or buying groceries for the family. Sometimes do them.
Create time for your children. Play with them.
Do the school run! Very important. DO SCHOOL RUN. A window of opportunity to impact your children. That morning and afternoon talk in the car is the bomb. Don’t always miss it. Create time. Bond with your children.
Intentionally teach them. Keep reinforcing your teachings.
Take that long walk with your children
Take that your daughter out on a date (an opportunity to teach meaningfully, grab it)
Sometimes take her to a salon, and take the boys to a barbers shop.
Teach them values and model them too
Don’t always be aggressive. Sometimes practice calmness in your home. Your family will love you more and everyone will be free with you.
Be very relational with your children. If you don’t connect with them, you can’t correct them when they are going down the wrong path. Remember you are to direct them, so don’t scare them away.
Love your children unconditionally and equally. Don’t be sentimental.
Be a loving Man, husband, and father.
There are many reasons why you must do these.
Modeling is one of the greatest ways to teach a child. Model acceptable behaviour and values before your child/children.
Connection and guidance too is a way to get your child to learn. Connect with them. Bond with them. It’s easier to teach them at this level of relationship.
Your children will learn from you. When they become parents too, they will recycle and update the parenting knowledge experienced. Let’s get it right now.
Women! If you see a man with these qualities;
submit, respect, cherish, HELP, love, pray, and adore the man.
This parenting journey is not for the weak, neither is it for the fathers or mothers alone. It’s a joint effort by parents who are eager to make a difference. It will require some level of “sacrifices, selflessness, dedication, tolerance, patience, commitment, etc.”
The Lord is our strength.
#parenting #fathersinvolvement #family #raisingchildren #values #letsgetitright