Interestingly, parents play the largest role in the character formation of their child and have the most impact on how the child turns out to be in life as he/she grows up. We must all realise that the seeming laxity of the youths is simply a reflection of the moral bankruptcy of our various homes. The home is a component of the society and whatever happens in it is reflected in the society. Parents should educate their children in character and learning because when the foundation is right, they would be transformed when they come out.
Here are some tips in raising responsible child/children. (Remember it is easier to train a child than repair a broken adult.)
Teach them Morals. Moral values must be instilled in children right from the beginning, and no age is too early to start. They play a significant role in building the personality of the child and have the biggest say in how your child shapes his/her life. And a child’s first learning institution is his or her home. It is at home that a child should learn to:
- Be honest
- Be content
- Be polite/respectful
- Be focused
- Be organized
- Be punctual
- Be compassionate
- Say thank you
- Say I am sorry
- Say, please forgive me
- Be resilient
- Be grateful and appreciative.
Imagine if you teach your child to say ‘thank you’ and also be ‘contented’ with what he/she has. That could mark the beginning of a life sense of gratitude and contentment, among others.
Have a routine for your child. A child’s day should be programmed. If you have set rules and routines it will guide the child to live productively. Teach the child to know that there is time for everything. Time to pray, time to eat, time to study, time to play, and time for other activities. This will help the child to understand time management which is a prerequisite for a successful life today. Program your child’s day!
Get involved. As parents you must ensure you are part of your child’s daily activity. Be a ‘Parent-Friend’ to your child. When you get involved, you can easily detect when the child is going out of track and immediately redirect the child to the right path. When your child make friends, study the friends to ensure they will have a healthy relationship. When it’s screen time for your child, monitor what he/she watches and put restrictions where needed. Ask questions. Find out your child’s needs and make adequate provisions. Be there for your child.
Encourage and support your child. Encourage your child always. Build your child’s confidence through motivation and encouragement. When they fail, encourage them, and let them know failing is a process of growth. Sometimes we fail to raise. Be supportive. Support them emotionally, mentally, spiritually, physically and in every other aspect of his/her life. If you don’t encourage your child and support them they loose confidence and become non-assertive, naïve, gullible and easily deceived. Be there for your child.
Prophesy to your child always. Speak good words to your child. Don’t get so angry that you abuse or curse your child. No! Always speak positive words to your child. All that you wish to see in your child’s future, begin from cradle to speak it into that child’s life.
Model your expectations. Everything you want your child to do, you must first model it to him/her. Children learn more through observations and not necessarily through Instructions/teachings. If you want to raise children with integrity, be a parent of impeccable integrity. If you want your child to learn honesty, be an honest parent. If you want your child to learn compassion, model it through your actions towards people. The way you treat your cleaners, your staff, the poor, the sick, the hungry, the less privilege, will help them learn empathy and compassion.
The G-factor. The G-factor is the God factor. He is the general overseer. I will not take the place of God for any reason. It is very important that parents pray for their child/children consistently. We do our parts and leave the rest to God. In my home, my husband and I take a day in the week to fast and pray for our children. This is a deliberate act. It’s an act worthy of emulation. Do we still pray every other day? Yes we do, but we don’t fast! I encourage you to be intentional in raising your child so you can raise the best child that will be a blessing to you and the world at large.